.

sucks.
fuck.
broken down.

unexpected things poped poped poped out just like popcorn.
and they are not tasty. at all.

TOO MUCH THINGS TO TALKED ABOUT. UNPLEASANT ONES. and i dun wanna looked back my archives and realised how useless i am now.

why cant i just live simply. why am i still here, wasting my time, affecting my studies.
somedays i just wanna be normal abit. i wanna live the life i had last time. i missed those days. being so carefree and free. doing things i like to do anytime, anywhere.

so much so for doing so much. and things just dun fall into place. all i can say is that i am unlucky enough thou. i found myself useless, stucked and wasting the earth's resources. somehow i feel that all the blame is on me. i would just pull off everything. if i dun exist, it will not turn out this way. it'll be better off without me. actually i feel like giing up everything and start afresh everything the next day. i will definitely feel better that way. but i just cant do that, cuz i care about wat other ppl said. alot. i will affect me alot. and it'll be breaching of my life principle. i tell myself, i'll breach it if i really cant take it. durians are thorny outside, but inside, it's still soft. seriously. i'm speaking the fact now. prolly leaving at this point of time, will make everything better. if it's the way, please tell me, i dun wanna waste both parties' time.

i really wanna go back to my old life. no life as it can be, at least i will feel more comfortable, and happier. i just wanna lead a simple life? like REAL SOON?

why do i wanna engage myself in stuff that wasted my precious time? i would live my normal life and be the peishan i used to be last time without all these. i always want to quit, but if it's not for some stuff, i just will not even step in into this deep shit if mine. and yes, i've changed. i'm not the peishan that i know i used to be. and i cant rewind it now. i tried too. but prolly, i have to let go off some stuff before some other stuff can happen. i suck. my attitude sucks. my temper sucks too. my critical thinking sucks. i just suck. fuck. i need to go. real soon. no matter how elastic a rubber band can be, it will still snap when it reaches a limit. alright, i know i am not capable. but everyone has to learn this process right. well, i dun wanna talk here all about how i feel, it'll just never end. yes, i did learn alot of things and had memorable memories. but all these.. will be gone someday. i dun want to let go of it, but in life, it's just this way. if you dun allow space, how can you allow more space to come in?

ok. i dunno wtf i am talking and thinking about, now. it's just random tots. whatever i wanna say, i just typed it out. so its ok if you all dun understand you all dun bother too. it dosent matter then. at least i wrote it out.

ANYWAY, SORRY FOR ANY INCONVENIENCE CAUSED BY MY SUCKY ATTITUDE AND MY BLOODY TEMPER.

please let me survive these disgusting days..
SURVIVE is a very big word in this case..