.

i'm left with one week. and i've not studied. been out this week. pls pray that i can at least pass my exams. i have confidence that i'll no longer see my name on thee honours roll. i definitely know that being on the list once will not secure my name on that list for the next few semesters. and people, drill tat into ur heads too.

i have lotsa things i want and need to do. but i just cant fork out the time. i wonder if i have reali make use of time. (not in order)

- study! i cant control myself not to be sleepy and lazy.
- retrieve my ez link card at maxwell road (where the hack?). it's been there for more than 2 months.
- change my passport photo
- go for the other 3 basic theory lessons at one go if possible. the freaking bukit batok driving center is at bukit gombak + 15 min walk.
- do some market research on trade-in value for my hp and change it to k800i?
- shopping.
- make specs (yes, i'm gonna be nerd once again) .
- get rid of my dark eye circles and eye bags.
- visit my grandma more often.
- more gatherings.
- exercise.
- and the list goes on...


random:
sometimes i cant help it but to sae appearances do matter. people treat you differently base on looks. obviously, the better looking's' will have better treatment. the world is just unfair.


"watever that fills ur mind in the day, will be a dream for you in the nite."
i dreamt of you and me. i wish i can never wake up from that dream. the reality hurts so much so that it's totally different from the dream. truely, dream and reality is often the opposite. dejavu happens to me very oftenly, but i know that this dream that i had, will never ever come true. i know. and the truth is, i've dreamt bout you and me, more than once. you dunno. you dunno everything. you've beginning to control my life, my mood. indirectly.
i alwaes tell myself,
'dun waste time. you know that it can never happen. and that if it happens, it cant be happening on you. and in the end you know that you are the one who will be hurt by him. little things that he did now had already hurt you, wat's more in the future? and even if you're hurt, he doesnt know. even if he knows, he doesnt care. cuz it doesnt bother him. it's none of his business. it's you urself who chose to hold on. and know that you'll be hurt. this is so not you. why do you wanna get urself hurt when you already know that it'll happen? you are so stupid, so foolish. did so much, hurt so much and he doesnt know, will not know. he's not the onli man. he may not be the one. there are better ones out there. '
yes, i can tell that all to myself.
but i cannot do it. i just cannot. i dunno y. i'm trapped..